cashew: Nokoru looking drained with a steaming cup of tea and his fingers up in a victory sign (CCD // exhausted)
[personal profile] cashew

Most of the foods Chinese people associated with "Traditional Chinese Cuisine" are fairly recent.

某人穿越到先秦

“里边请,请问客官是打尖还是住店?”

“我吃面!”

“那抱歉,这位客官,面条可是要到宋朝的款式才能定形呢,小店现在还没有”

“什么鸟店!连碗面都没有,馒头包子总有吧,上一屉!”

“这位爷,也没有,这得等到蜀汉诸葛丞相伐孟获才有,抱歉了您呢……”

“擦!那你们不会只供应白米饭吧!”

“抱歉,咱这是关中,水稻啊,得过了长江才能种,咱这也没有……”

“要死了,来个大侠套餐吧,二两女儿红,半斤熟牛肉……你捂我嘴干嘛!”

“客官,轻点声!私宰耕牛那可是大罪,被人告了可是充军流放的罪过,万万不敢啊!”

“得得得,酒我也不喝了,茶水总有吧?”

“茶?那玩意儿得汉朝才有,哪怕到唐朝也是士大夫喝的,咱这儿也没有……”

“你他娘的到底有什么?”

“粟米的窝窝饼,可以沾肉酱,烫白菜。”

“敢情你这开的是麻辣烫的店啊!”

“瞧您说的,辣椒到明代才引进呢,小店只有花椒,只麻不辣。”

“那就不能炒个青菜,非要开水烫?”

“那个铁锅得到宋后期才能生产,所以没法炒菜,那个菜油呢,得到明后期普遍种植油菜花了小店才供应 的上。”

“…………”

“客官您还要什么?”

“……”

“客官您别走啊!

During Qin(秦)dynasty, there were no noodles, no buns, no steam bread, no rice, no beef, no tea, no stir-fry (no woks), no chili peppers...

No. Tea.

*cries in Chinese*

How the fuck did the Qin Emperor unify China?

An elaboration:

  • Noodles weren't made until Song(宋)dynasty

  • Wheat wasn't ground into flour until post-Three Kingdoms era (Zhuge Liang brought the milling technology into China)

  • Rice only grew in a small region south of the Yangtze, so most people in China couldn't eat it

  • It was illegal to butcher oxen and the punishment was the death penalty

  • Tea was cultivated in the Han(汉)dynasty (post-Qin)

  • Cast iron technology for woks, which are used for stir-frying, came about near the end of the Song dynasty (copper/brass cookware were the norm pre-Song and most foods were boiled)

  • Chili peppers weren't brought into China until Ming(明)

(will be screened)
(will be screened if not validated)
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

If you are unable to use this captcha for any reason, please contact us by email at support@dreamwidth.org

April 2025

S M T W T F S
  12345
6789101112
13141516171819
202122232425 26
27282930   

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Page generated Saturday, May 24th, 2025 03:49
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios