Does Not Obey the Laws of Physics

So, my fever is gone, my voice is back, my throat isn't hurting, and the pre-menstural inflammation has died down. I am, at the moment, feeling like a normal human being again. Yay!

And I get to pick up cleaning up where I left off from a week or so ago. ... less yay.

Anyway, so now that I'm feeling recovered, I'm back to bitching about stupid questions I see raised in the D&D community that makes me wonder about people's creative juices. (I mean, yes, AI is still less creative than the stupidest human DM, but it would seem that, unfortunately, the average human brain is just not that much better at the moment.)

Case in point, here's an actual question that was actually asked:

My player's level 2 (soon 3) Druid has discovered that while in Wild Shape in spider form, they are almost impossible to catch, especially since in caves etc. they "fit in" (which I agreed to twice).

However, this results in the PCs knowing pretty much the entire dungeon layout since those are somewhat small.

What can I do to hinder this full exploration without being unfair?

So, I don't want to be mean to this person directly, which is why I'm ranting on my own journal here, and why I'm not linking this question or sourcing it, because internet randos can be weird about staying in one's own lane. Anyway.

On the matter of Druid scouting in spider form: THAT IS THE POINT YOU DUMBASS. Sorry, I should be nicer.

Look, DM-person, I'm going to have to be real with you. Your job is to facilitate the players. Yes, you should put obstacles in front of PCs so that they can solve it, which is what makes games a game. However, a Druid using the spider form to scout ahead is game as intended. You're not fixing the gameplay experience by "patching" this oversight. Is your druid player enjoying being able to use a charge of Wild Shape to get the entire map revealed? THEN DON'T CHANGE ANYTHING. The druid, at level two, has only two uses of Wild Shape. That means they gave up a very strong and powerful class resource to be able to pull this trick off. That is a willing choice they made. This means they will have one less use of Wild Shape later in the adventuring day and the player chose to spend it on scouting. This is fun for them so let them have their fun.

Now, if the druid player complains about how "easy" the dungeon has become and that it lacks surprises or other party members complain about the druid getting to do all the cool stuff and being too useful or if the rogue player feels like their job has become useless, then and only then do you have a problem.

Assuming that these are the type of complaints that came up and not just the DM-person being a toxic DM-vs-Player type of gamer, the answer to these problems also are so mind-bogglingly obvious that I don't understand why you need to ask strangers online for help. (Maybe this person is an immature teenager and haven't developed the necessary social skills to handle this. I'll be generous here.)

1. Players feel the dungeon is too easy.

First, talk to the player about why they think it's too easy. Because if knowing the floor plan is enough to make the dungeon a cakewalk, YOU the DM are doing something VERY WRONG.

Second, it is reasonable to allow the party to know the map layout and each room's NPCs (provided they aren't magically hidden), but they shouldn't know about any of the traps! Because, remember, this is SPIDER!DRUID, and spider!druid is too tiny and too light to set off any of the traps or notice the traps. And if the players make guesses at what the structures might mean, THEN THEY ARE PLAYING THE GAME AS INTENDED. They are using their player brains to try to figure out the puzzle that is the dungeon and that is a good thing. You should be encouraging them to scout more. Place more visual hints, some fake some real, and make them guess whether a tile is safe based only on the visual cues (which is what the spider!druid ought to be picking up)!

2. Other party members don't get to have any spotlight.

If the other party members feel the scouting takes too long, just time skip the scouting. Tell the druid, "Great, spider!druid mark off a charge of Wild Shape. Here is what you learned during your scouting mission, give me a second to remove all the covering bits so you get the whole layout of the dungeon. The rest of the party, spider!druid came back and you have this mental map of what the dungeon looks like inside. Knowing this, what would you like to do?"

3. The rogue feels their role is being stepped on.

If another player would like to be able to roleplay the scouting mission and feel that the druid is hogging all the session time, have a discussion with the two players in question and first ask the players how they would like to divvy up the party roles. If the players can't work it out, then you can offer the suggestion that the rogue contributes by picking locks, disarming traps, and all that other skill monkey stuff that rogues are really good at, so that they can make the dungeon easier for the less stealthy party members to move through the rooms without giving away the party's location to the dungeon residents or set off an early warning alarm.

And then, when the party cooperates, reward team work. Because circumventing traps and alarms is part of the game. You should be expecting players to circumvent the traps and alarms, not catching them in it as a gotcha. PCs should only be trapped if they haven't put in resources to scout and disarm first. If they had to give up a whole charge of Wild Shape, then fucking reward them.

I've had a long week, because I've been basically moving on high gear for the past 5 days and I'm like exhausted as woah. So some brainless chatter.

Why solo D&D?

Have you ever solo'd an MMO? Played solitaire board games? Played chess against yourself? Played any form of "multi-player" yourself?

There you go. If you enjoy a game, you wanna play it and you don't want to have to wait until you can wrangle 3-5 adults into setting up a schedule to play with you. Hence. Solo D&D.

OK, but why D&D?

Because it is the biggest TTRPG on the market. There's a lot of published adventures for D&D and once you figured out how to play D&D by yourself, you'll probably have a good idea of what kind of rules are fun for you versus what kind of rules you don't like. And you'll be comfortable running through any kind of system and hacking it into doing what you enjoy.

So, let's get to playing some solo D&D.

( Step-by-step walkthrough of how to play a published adventure by yourself. )

Ok, I know this like matters to exactly zero people, but I just have to say that after reading a lot of how people interpret words on forums, my conclusion is that while Druidcraft is still slightly weaker utility-wise compared to the other two RP cantrips (Prestidigitation and Thaumaturgy) , it is also being even more shafted by people who can't read.

One of Druidcraft's biggest advantages over Prestidigitation is that it is written with subtle spell casting. Unlike Prestidigitation, which is labeled with a default verbal component (which in D&D rules lawyering means audible chanting), the first sentence of Druidcraft's description is "Whispering to the spirits of nature". Combine that with 30ft range (instead of the 10ft range of Prestidigitation), that means Druidcraft's Sensory Effect can be cast from distance in secret without the target realizing the effect came from a spell.

In other words, while a Druid can make the woods whisper terrible things into your ear without you being able to figure it out, a Wizard has to be basically within reach to try those things. Therefore, in terms of pulling off tricks like "create a stinky smell to distract the guards" can be pulled off with Druidcraft, but will require a lot more set up using Prestidigitation.

Still doesn't make up for the fact that Bloom and Weather Sensor sub-effects have low RP and utility value compared to Clean or Soil and Minor Creation and Minor Sensation. Again, Prestidigitation getting six effects compared to Druidcraft's four makes Prestidigitation the better RP cantrip. But Druidcraft really could be significantly better if the D&D crowd remembered Druidcraft's built-in subtle spell casting.

I maintain that Druidcraft's Weather Sensor should be changed into generating a localized (aka one square or 5x5x5ft sized) harmless weather effect, like tiny rain cloud that waters the plant or a tiny sun to function as a hand warmer, etc. And Bloom needs to do more to plants than just make a bud open. If making shelter with a cantrip is considered too useful, then at the very least it needs to be able to boost plant vitality, like revive a (non-magical) dead tree temporarily (an hour seems reasonable) or make ivy crawl up a wall and cover a window (then withering away after an hour). Personally I think using Druidcraft to make plants grow in a 5x5x5ft plot to create difficult terrain really isn't overpowered given Mold Earth (a cantrip) can do the same just about everywhere (without needing plants available).

And for all the people worried about Plant Growth being outshine, given that Plant Growth has no time limit and is permanent, I'd say uh...no.

As much as I love Studio Ghibli material and worlds, I'm not very happy at seeing Obojima being officially collected on D&D Beyond. Mostly because the book is written by a bunch of white guys who seem to think watching some Ghibli movies means they can capture the nostalgic nature of Studio Ghibli's creation and fail to realize the magic of Studio Ghibli isn't something that can be reproduced through emulation. It's not the "vibe" that makes a Studio Ghibli film what it is, it's the themes, thoughts, personal experiences that Takahata and Miyazaki brings to the story that makes the works stand out.

Fundamentally, Studio Ghibli works center around personal growth and contrasting the mystical with the mundane. Magic is both whimsical and terrible in the Ghibli worlds, yes, even in a work like Kiki's Delivery, because magic is the domain of childhood. Because the purpose of magic in Ghibli works is to be a metaphor for childhood wonder. This is in direct opposition of what magic stands for in D&D, which is a tool to be used rather than a majesty of nature to be wondered at. The way magic is handled narratively is fundamentally in opposition of each other. So unless the system reduces access to magic as you level up (which it doesn't), this project is just a ... really shitty imitation.

In other news: It's been really hot and I'm melting. Plus, I've been going through some really shitty cramps for about a week now.

Er, sorry, I've been otherwise occupied. I'm not getting into it, let's go to the stuff I actually want to write about: re-mixing a D&D race, because the Fairy as it exists is not the correct fantasy.

( Homebrew Fairy )